Few words can describe the power of family constellations and the important role they play in healing family entanglements that keep us trapped in repetitive pain and trauma patterns.
I asked if I could constellate my father, Ronnie. He was a sad and depressed man and sometimes it feels as if I’m following in his footsteps. I have this undeniable feeling of trying to escape, run, and hide from myself and others. I have this tendency to zone out and close off from the world. My father did the same. He had been wounded in the Second World War. He suffered from post-traumatic stress which went undiagnosed all his life. In family constellations, we bring in representatives who take on the soul energy of those who have come before.
I stepped into the morphogenic field of knowing and asked a woman to represent me. She stood swaying from side to side with a pain in her neck. She was strongly leaning to her right, mirroring my exact holding patterns. My dad’s representative stood strong and unwavering. Like my father, he was distant and unavailable to me. We then called in the Second World War who came to stand next to Dad. “This is too big for you,” my father’s representative said. “Leave it with me and free yourself to live a better life.” The last movement had me reconciling with Dad and holding him for the longest time. I cried into the black t-shirt of this tall man who had the same sense as my father.
It took me 2 days to process what had just happened. I had reconnected with my father’s energy after all these years. This was the man who loved me and protected me from the harsh criticism of my mother. He was a lonely man who lived an unfulfilled life. I ask myself, have I lived a lie all these years following in the same dysfunctional pattern as my father? Unseen and ignored. When this idea sunk in I felt a huge burden lifted from my shoulders. I am finally free.
Family constellation work is the work of healing family pain and trauma. This is a modality we practice and facilitate. This is the work of our soul. This is the work of healing ourselves and others to live a life of infinite possibility.